I was quiet, but I wasn't blind.

Know those days where you just want to voice out what you're thinking because everything's just too much? 

Yup. Today's one of the day. 

Over the years, from the age of oblivion to the age of prudent, when you reached this stage of life and realise no matter how hard you try to be impassive towards feelings, 
nothing seems to work. 

Even when you realise you're left all along here, that those feelings will never be reciprocate. The part where you always have to remind yourself that it's not going to go back to how is it anymore. 
Know what's the worse thing having to wake up to every single day? 
It's being reminded of the things you want to forget. 

I was the type of person that held only things too tight.
Unable to realise my grip even when it no long felt right. 
And although it gave me blisters, and my finger will all ache, 
I always thought that holding on, was worth the pain it takes. 
In losing thing, I'd lose a part of me too. 
That slowly I'd become someone, my heart no longer knew. 
Someone i no longer regconise. 

You can try to change things back to how they were or try to create things to be the way you want them, but you'll never be truly happy because it'll never be anything like how things once were. 

But what to do when all you've left is hope? 
To wake up everyday feeling the same, 
When the déjà vu or memories are so bad you have to close your eyes and wish it all away. 

Perhaps. We never did start. 
And we never will. 

Don't put your happiness in other people's hands. 
They'll drop it.
They'll drop it every time.